5pm. Plane to Washington.
"Something is not adding up." Shay says to mom.
"No shit. It looks like we might have a good ole Heinz 57 on our hands." Mom says.
"What is a Heinz 57?"
"Lots of red stuff, no real change in taste."
"So what is the plan from here?"
"Wait till Josh and Dad get back. We'll talk about it as a family." Josh and Dad return from the lavatory.
"Damn Southwest flights. Never enough toilet paper." Dad grumbled. Dad and Josh sat down.
"Well, guys, we have gotten ourselves into quite the predicament." Mom says.
"No kidding. I have not killed this many people in one day since I was 12." Josh says.
"So what is the next step?" Shay asks.
"You know what they say kid." Mom says. "All the shit in the USA flows to Washington DC."
"Of course. That is where my guns are made." Josh says. "They make the best Chinese knockoffs." Everyone laughs...then does kind of a double take.
"Well, that would be if the plane was actually on the way to Washington." An ominous voice was heard over the loudspeaker.
"The fuc..." Josh starts to say.
"You see, kind Boudreauxs...you have meddled in our plans long enough..." suddenly the plane started to move and shake. The Boudreauxs gear up.
"You will never escape. We have chased you all day. This is the end for you." Suddenly Dad Boudreaux appears from the front of the plane. He pulls a gun and shoots the other Dad Boudreaux in the forehead.
"What the fuc..." Josh starts to say.
"He was an impostor. Those have been springing up all over the world. Various heads of state have been dying at the hands of me."
"Thank God...some plot..." Mom says.
"Apparently an evil organization has been organizing World War 3...but on a much higher scale than you might imagine...today Angola Merkel...David Cameron...and President Obama have all been killed. And of course Angola was raped first."
"Of course." Shay says.
"But I was able to break out of the prison they had me in in New Orleans in time to come get you guys. We have to jump off the plane. It is remote controlled and headed for a crash."
"How do you know all this? Mom asked.
"I am your husband dear. I know where you keep all your knives too." Mom Boudreaux blushes. "Parachutes guys...we are above Washington. Thankfully the villains who have booby trapped this plane are not good with Google Maps."
The Boudreauxs strap on parachutes and hop out of the plane.
"Something is not adding up." Shay says to mom.
"No shit. It looks like we might have a good ole Heinz 57 on our hands." Mom says.
"What is a Heinz 57?"
"Lots of red stuff, no real change in taste."
"So what is the plan from here?"
"Wait till Josh and Dad get back. We'll talk about it as a family." Josh and Dad return from the lavatory.
"Damn Southwest flights. Never enough toilet paper." Dad grumbled. Dad and Josh sat down.
"Well, guys, we have gotten ourselves into quite the predicament." Mom says.
"No kidding. I have not killed this many people in one day since I was 12." Josh says.
"So what is the next step?" Shay asks.
"You know what they say kid." Mom says. "All the shit in the USA flows to Washington DC."
"Of course. That is where my guns are made." Josh says. "They make the best Chinese knockoffs." Everyone laughs...then does kind of a double take.
"Well, that would be if the plane was actually on the way to Washington." An ominous voice was heard over the loudspeaker.
"The fuc..." Josh starts to say.
"You see, kind Boudreauxs...you have meddled in our plans long enough..." suddenly the plane started to move and shake. The Boudreauxs gear up.
"You will never escape. We have chased you all day. This is the end for you." Suddenly Dad Boudreaux appears from the front of the plane. He pulls a gun and shoots the other Dad Boudreaux in the forehead.
"What the fuc..." Josh starts to say.
"He was an impostor. Those have been springing up all over the world. Various heads of state have been dying at the hands of me."
"Thank God...some plot..." Mom says.
"Apparently an evil organization has been organizing World War 3...but on a much higher scale than you might imagine...today Angola Merkel...David Cameron...and President Obama have all been killed. And of course Angola was raped first."
"Of course." Shay says.
"But I was able to break out of the prison they had me in in New Orleans in time to come get you guys. We have to jump off the plane. It is remote controlled and headed for a crash."
"How do you know all this? Mom asked.
"I am your husband dear. I know where you keep all your knives too." Mom Boudreaux blushes. "Parachutes guys...we are above Washington. Thankfully the villains who have booby trapped this plane are not good with Google Maps."
The Boudreauxs strap on parachutes and hop out of the plane.